mysticnegro.com Kranky v3.0

Ever since JPR dropped word on The Take’s foray into commuter bikes in the comments I’ve been waiting to see what the finished product would look like.  Obviously, they weren’t going to get much coverage in the BMX media, and they don’t seem to be getting much play The Take’s website, either.  But I did spot a picture of them over on FBM’s site.

I give ‘em a seven.

They look fine, and they definitely both look like they could be nice bases for your very own RRB project (although, you could argue that a high quality base defeats the purpose of a rat rod bike).  There’s just something about the handlebars that I’m not feelin’.  I think it’s mostly the bottom one, which desperately needs its bars flipped and a number plate.  Still if they can hit the price point they were aiming for (it was $400, correct?) they definitely look worth it for round town transportation.

2010 GT Bump

Stop

Just.  Stop.

This is a word problem which assumes that everyone has seen the new Deco bars. If you haven’t

Deco FUBars

(Word of warning to anyone who hasn’t been to the Deco site, it is largely concerned with showing she-nipples in all of their glory and horror.  It is almost completely NSFW unless you work on a porn set.)

Chad has described them as having the look and feel of  four piece bars in a  two piece bar.  He’s also admitted that, they’re basically Bob Bars.

So – True or False – IF the new Deco bars look almost exactly like the bars on my 1st gen GT Pro Performer AND they are based on the Animal Bob Bars AND IF Bob Bars are basically GT four piece bars AND IF those GT four piece bars are four piece versions of the two piece bars on my 1st gen GT Pro Performer DOES Rich Long’s head spin around in his grave?

I have OD’d on Interbike footage and I have some words for you.

Pacific – Hey, you let GT put out a frame, welcome to the late 20th century! I won’t take you seriously until you re-release the Pacman fork.

The Take/The Make - You take this shit outside and settle it like gentlemen.  I thought it was a typo when I clicked on that video.  It’s like buying your wife a Prado bag for Christmas.  Also, did the commuter bikes get shown?  If not I am a sad panda.

Haro/Premium - Hey, a new frame that’s as light as a scooter, but isn’t a scooter?  Yeah, that won’t end badly at all.

Eastern - I’ve defended you against all sorts of criticism for all sorts of things.  But, then I saw this and the bleeding from my eyes started.  While I like the Nitrous series (and the branding of which makes me think you might be gearing it up to make it its own brand) nothing makes up for the Dragon/Reaper/Boss.  BMX companies, Killarado clones make the Baby Jesus cry.

Intense - Shaun Palmer is, without a doubt, the single greatest athlete of his generation (which is, of course, my generation), however he has some of the stupidest tattoos of any living human being.  I’m talking about The Palm’s return to your mountain bike team because, let’s be honest, it’s more interesting than your freestyle bikes which are notable only in that they are full of Sinz parts.  Good try, they look nice and all, I’d even buy one, but I don’t think anyone’s going to notice.

Fit - If my calculations are right, everyone on your team now has a signature bike except Van Homan. Wait, I just checked Dans and Van does have a signature complete available for 2010, that’s everyone.

MacNeil – Speaking of signature bikes, it’s a bit weird that I can order the Young III frame from Dan’s and you just dropped Young?  I mean, at first I thought it was older, but then I realized the graphics are all in your new design language.  Does he still get royalties? Ohyeah, the 22.2mm seat tube is stupid.

MirraCo - Mike Spinner rode for you guys for like three years and didn’t get a signature frame, but Harry Main gets one after a week and a half?  Was it the Jew Fro?  Also, can someone explain this to me.  Dave Mirra is sponsored by Snafu.  Dave Mirra co-owns MirraCo.  MirraCo has a parts line that competes directly with Snafu. Jim Ford lets you get away with this shit?  I thought his entire job was to provide adult supervision so that HIS BUSINESS PARTNER WOULDN’T RIDE A COMPETITOR’S PRODUCT.

Hyper - I don’t care that Spinner doesn’t grind, 3/8″ rear axles are stupid.

I’ve found that there are two types of people in the comsumer electronics world, those who love Sony and those who loathe Sony.  I know, you thought that Mac vs. PC was the big CE battle, no, it’s Sony vs Everyone Else.  But even those who love Sony fall into the superset of those who are annoyed by Sony.  You see, Sony desperately, desperately wants to rule the world through proprietary standards.  sometimes they’re, admittedly, superior to the competition and fail due to sheer hubris (Betamax).  Sometimes they’re marginally successful, but don’t actually replace the existing standard (Blu-Ray).  Usually they’re just annoying and provide no advantage over the competition and exist only so that Sony can try to lock you into its ecosystem for the rest of your natural born life (MemoryStick).

Yeah, MacNeil. I’m not sure who’s idea it was to go back to the 22.2mm seat post/tube, but stop it already.  “Lighter and stronger” my ass, you’re talking grams of weight savings and if it’s lighter it’s weaker (that’s the way tubes work, if you decrease the diameter of a tube, you have to increase the wall thickness to keep the same strength, unless they’re using higher grade steel for the seat tube).  But, let’s call a spade a spade.  Unless other frame makers jump onto this idiocy, the only people selling 22.2mm posts will be MacNeil.  It’s not a lot of money, but times is hard, a few extra dollars per frame might add up to real money in the short term.

Maybe it’s not a naked money grab, maybe it’s just another case of a BMX company hoping that metallugical science will make up for the fact that modern BMX bike design is about aesthetics and scales above all (I’d like to head off anyone who says that the modern BMX bike evolved to a double diamond design because the triangle is nature’s most stable shape.  The triangle IS geometrically stable, but I’d like you to compare the front end of a bike from 5 years ago to the front end of a bike from today,  smaller tubing has resulted in a front quadrangle).

Who am I kidding, it’s probably both.

Jay Miron still remains my second all time favorite rider (behind Fiola, above Bestwick).  I hate to see that his latest trick is shark jumping.

Young Mr. Smillie is apparently going to SLC to the Dew Tour/Free Flow Tour finals thanks to this video.  It’s not embeddable, so you’ll have to go to the Ride site to see it.  In order to not spoil the congratulatory mood I won’t even make fun of him.  Good going, D.

Jesse James has managed to do a lot of stuff in his relatively short life.  He’s built a bunch of motorcycles.  He starred on a show where they turned cars into..cars.  He managed to get the phrase, “direct descendant of,” redefined to mean “nephew” (Jesse is a direct descendant of A Jesse James, but THE Jesse James is his uncle).  He married and (allegedly) become the deadbeat baby daddy to one of the biggest pornographic actresses in history, then he left her and married good girl actress, Sandra Bullock.  He also produced a movie you may have seen called “Joe Kid on a Stingray,” and publishes a quarterly hot rodding magazine called “Garage.”

The thing about Garage is the guys who run it are SoCal guys in their 30s – 40s.  Which is to say they all grew up skating and riding BMX bikes.  This month they had some sketches from Jason Jesse and an interview with Gary Turner which is interesting in that there’s absolutely nothing he said about the founding of GT that wouldn’t be said by any of the half gajillion riders who would go on to found their own companies in his wake. One thing that caught my eye was that Gary’s contribution to BMX was the introduction of 4130 and big tubes.  Apparently he found out by talking to his car fabricating friends that he could increase the strength of frames by using tubes with paper thin walls but large diameters and made out of higher quality metal.  Looking at modern frames, we’ve got 2 out of 3.  I can’t be the only one that misses fat downtubes.

Anyway, the current issue also includes a ride along with everyone’s favorite BMXer turne cop.  No, not Brian Blyther.  No, not Robbie Miranda, either.  Stu Thomsen.  It may be stuff you’ve already read, but it’s still a good read and it’s nice to know that he’s never stopped riding bikes, even at 51. They even took him out to the track and he still looks like STU FUCKING THOMSEN when riding.

So, there you go, if you feel like getting some old school jollies, pick up a copy.  It’s good stuff.

Jason Williams and I disagree strongly about a couple of things.

1. Whether or not everyone should own a T-1 (He says yes, I say no)
2. Whether or not Eastern sucks (I say no, he says yes)
3. What’s the greatest band to ever come out of Baltimore.  He foolishly believes it’s Clutch.  I love Clutch, but I still say Wrathchild/Wrathchild America/Souls at Zero own that title (then Clutch, then Fear of God).

I’m not sure if this is a cool triumph of a small family business with a dream made reality, or just what you need when you absolutely, positively, MUST prove to your neighbors that you’re hung like a baby’s pinkie toe.  Either way, it’ll seat you, half of your friends and every bike ever made.

In case you couldn’t figure it out, the bed tilts to make a ramp to load stuff on the roof.

[Via Autoblog]